Recover from infidelity and cheating betrayal

Recover from infidelity and cheating betrayal. Find out how to get over an affair, repair and heal yourself. Marital affairs destroy relationships and ends relationships, yet many  spouses ignore the signs of betrayal and not get help until infidelity has occurred.  The betrayal and mistrust leaves their partner heartbroken. Many partners collude with the affair taking place, by ignoring the signs of  cheating by giving their partner chances, blindly taking them back without addressing the issues in marriage counselling. You cannot recover from infidelity if you deny it occurred. Meanwhile, others become bitter and hold it against them, without repairing. Find out how to manage an affair and recover from infidelity. .

What are the signs your partner is cheating?

iStock_000007963437XSmallMany are shocked to realise the betrayal of infidelity. Many ignore the signs that their partner is cheating because they do not want to face it. All of a sudden your partner acts out of character. You discover he or she is lying about their whereabouts and who they’re with. They make excuses to be away with urgent work  commitments and taking time away. You heard something or found  flirtatious messages. When you ask questions, their story does not add up or make sense. They avoid talking, walking off, or tell you that you are  insecure. One clear sign of cheating is when the partner cannot openly talk about the situation.

Recovery from infidelity after the betrayal

betrayal ends relationshipRecovery from infidelity after the betrayal is vital. It is important to deal with the infidelity in order to recover after the affair. The destruction caused by the betrayal ends relationships, if not treated in couples counselling. The betrayal and deception is painful to deal with on ones own. Many become shocked when the person they love is deceiving them, with lies and betrayal. Ignoring what is going on makes it harder to deal with, without seeing a counselor to work through the issues, so one can move forward. Without dealing with the betrayal, the hurt can prevent them from coping and functioning in life.

So, what causes a seemingly loving partner to become to betray a wife?  How can a partner cover up what is really going on for them? How can a devoted husband suddenly become the person you no longer trust? How does the betrayal potentially end relationships?

relationship ends

In relationship counselling Melbourne, many women become surprised to hear the truth behind their partners feelings. Many men cannot show their vulnerabilities and hurt towards their partner, when they felt rejected.   Some men felt ashamed to show how inadequate they felt when their wife could no longer respond to them. All of sudden, kids and routines take over causing the love and intimacy to disappear.  It is easier to get his needs met elsewhere, then expose how terrible he is feeling. He may feel rejected when his sexual advances are ignored, feeling no longer important or loved and escape the pain, by an affair because his wife is no longer  attuned to his needs anymore.  Suddenly, going out, distancing, having fun or drinking becomes the norm .

Yet, leading a double life or secret life with adultery ends relationships and never heals the wounds that are there. Sexual promiscuity provides temporary comfort from the pain, but it masks the underlying issues and destroys relationships.  When the honeymoon shine disappears from an enticing encounter,  it will eventually not be enough or  disappoint them, when the cracks appear. These destructive patterns of relating keep repeating, until these they sort themselves out with counselling. Many cheating spouses face difficulties having real intimacy, floating between lovers to avoid exposing themselves,  hiding feelings of vulnerability. Many want to keep chasing that spark or excitement to cover the emptiness or boredom they feel.

How to recover from infidelity and cheating betrayal

Recover from infidelity and heal your self

How does relationship therapy assist a couple to recover from infidelity and betrayal? Firstly couples counselling can assist if the affair is over. Their partner requires the support of therapy so they do not put up with an affair, if it happens again. The cheating partner has to be made accountable to address the  issues.  That means owning up and taking responsibility, being honest and truthful. Therapy  does not support a cheating partner to cover up his lies and secrets. Marital counselling is useful if the cheating spouse wants to work on the relationship after the betrayal.

cheating ends relationshipIf a partner is not certain that he does not want to give up the affair, it is suggested he undertake individual counselling in Melbourne. Often a woman will want her partner to come to marriage counselling to get them back. Yet, is the affair really over? Is the partner willing to come back? Some people become obsessed with the affair.  Others will be remorseful and want to work it out. Some women need to address their pain in counselling, to move forward, if she feels uncertain the affair is over.  It is not healthy to live with mistrust. If it is obvious your partner has turned his attention elsewhere and not interested in your relationship, then perhaps you need to see a therapist to explore why you are staying,  and see if you can heal yourself.

All content is copyright 2017 Nancy Carbone


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